120+ Conversation Topics To Bring LONG-DISTANCE COUPLES Closer
Whether you’ve just started or are years into a long-distance relationship, these long distance relationship conversation topics will help you understand your partner on a deeper level.
These long distance relationship conversation topics are divided into several categories listed in the summary.
These long distance relationship conversation topics aim to help you learn more about your partner and reveal whether you agree on various areas crucial for building a long-term partnership.
Being in a long-distance relationship myself, I know how important it is to maintain an emotional connection despite the physical distance.
So I hope these long distance relationship conversation topics serve this purpose.
Summary
- Long-distance relationship conversation topics:
- Routine check-ins
- Get to know each other better
- Relationship
- Childhood
- Friendships
- Career and ambitions
- Hobbies and interests
- Habits and lifestyle
- Sexual intimacy
- Values and religious beliefs
- Marriage and future planning
- Finance and money habits
- Fun and interesting
- How to prepare for a great conversation
- Frequently asked questions
- Conclusion
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DISCLOSURE
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Long distance relationship conversation topics for check-ins
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Asking these long-distance relationship conversation topics daily or weekly is meant to foster a consistent emotional connection that will hopefully bring you closer.
1. What was the highlight of your day
2. What was the worst part of your day
3. What are you grateful for today?
4. Did you learn anything new about yourself or others today?
5. What did you read today that drew your attention?
6. What did I do this week that made you feel loved?
Long distance relationship conversation topics to get to know each other better
These questions are meant to invite both of you to be more vulnerable, so be prepared to create a safe space where you can be comfortable being honest with your answers.
6. What keeps you up at night?
7. Is there anything that makes you feel insecure?
8. When do you feel the most confident?
9. What’s the best gift you’ve ever received?
10. How do you like to be consoled when you’re sad?
11. What choice had the greatest impact on your life? (question from Best Self)
12. What decision are you glad you didn’t make? (question from Best Self)
13. Is there a teacher that had a profound impact on you and why? (question from Best Self)
14. How do you like to receive criticism (question from Best Self)
15. How would you like to be remembered?
16. What’s a boundary you’ve set in past relationships, and why was it important to you? (question from Good Chat)
17. What did your last relationship teach you about love?
Long distance relationship conversation topics that encourage reflecting on your relationship
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There’s a mix of intimate and serious questions but the aim is to encourage you both to reflect on the relationship.
They invite you to remind each other why you’re both together and how you both can improve.
18. I feel the most loved when…
19. I feel the least loved when…
20. What’s a quality you admire about me?
21. What’s a favorite memory of us that you’d like to relive?
22. What’s a conflict of ours that you’d like to resolve?
23. Which couple do you admire and why?
24. What has our relationship taught you about love? (question from Agape)
25. How have we both changed since we first started dating? (question from Agape)
26. What’s one thing you need from me but are afraid to ask? (question from Agape)
27. What’s a small, seemingly insignificant moment in our relationship that you often think about? (question from Good Chat)
Long-distance relationship conversation topics to understand their childhood
Understanding your partner’s childhood gives you great insight into what drives their behavior. These questions will be a great place to start this long-distance relationship conversation topic.
28. What’s your relationship like with your parents?
29. What’s a trait you picked up from your parent(s)?
30. What’s one lesson you learned from observing your parents?
31. What’s your relationship like with your siblings?
32. What’s your favorite childhood memory?
33. Describe a memorable dinner.
34. What childhood memory you’ve never shared with me that shaped who you are today? (question from Good Chat)
35. What beliefs did you have when you were younger that no longer serve you? (question from Best Self)
Long-distance relationship conversation topics to understand their friendships
Knowing who your partner’s friends are is a great insight into who he surrounds himself with and what he values in a friendship or if he values friendship.
36. How would your friends describe you?
37. Name three friends that best represent you and why
38. Which friend would you call for advice?
39. How important is friendship to you?
40. Which friend would you call to bury a body?
41. You’re at a party and overhear someone spreading a hurtful rumor about a friend. What do you do? (question from Good Chat)
Long-distance relationship conversation topics to understand their career and ambitions
42. What’s your favorite part of your job?
43. What’s the worst part of your job?
44. Do you have career ambitions that you’d like to achieve?
45. Why did you choose the industry you’re in?
46. Are there any opportunities you’d like to pursue now?
47. What skill would you like to attain to further your ambitions?
48. What challenges are you facing at your current job?
49. What’s the best career advice you’ve received?
50. What can I do to support your ambitions?
51. What are your work hours like?
52. Do you bring work home with you?
53. Is your job your vocation or does it just pay the bills?
54. Is there a role you’d like to pursue?
Long distance relationship conversation topics to know their hobbies and interests
55. What do you like to do for fun?
56. Is there a hobby or activity you’d like to pursue?
57. Is there a hobby or activity you’d like us to pursue together?
58. Should you turn your hobby into a career or keep them separate?
Long-distance relationship conversation topics to know their habits and lifestyle
59. What habit have you cultivated that you’re most proud of?
60. What’s a habit that you’d like to eliminate?
61. Are you a morning person or a night owl?
62. Describe your perfect day
63. How do you like to spend your weekends or weeknights?
64. What seemingly insignificant thing contributes greatly to your happiness?
65. What daily habits or rituals do you swear by and think everyone should practice? (question from Best Self)
Long-distance relationship conversation topics to improve sexual intimacy
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66. What do I do that turns you on?
67. What part of your body do I kiss that turns you on?
68. How do you feel about sex toys?
69. How do you feel when one person orgasms but the other person doesn’t?
70. Do you have any insecurities in the bedroom that you’d like to address?
71. Does it matter how long it takes for you to orgasm?
72. What can I do to make you feel aroused? (question from Gottman’s Cards Deck App)
73. What does being aroused feel like for you? What are some of the sensations? (question from Gottman’s Cards Deck App)
Long distance relationship conversation topics to understand his values and religious beliefs
74. Do you follow a religion?
75. How important is it to have your future children practice your religion?
76. Is it important to be with someone who practices the same religion as you?
77. Which cause do you feel strongly about?
78. What’s one thing about yourself you would never change for anyone?
79. What do you have absolute faith in?
80. What’s a lesson you’ve learned that has truly shaped you?
81. What are your top three values from this list?
- Explain why you’ve chosen these three.
- How have you been practicing these values?
- Is there a value that you want to practice more of?
82. What are your political leanings?
83. If you were prime minister or president for the day, what would you like to enforce immediately?
84. What’s a belief you’d like to pass on to your children/future generation?
85. What’s your thought process when deliberating and making a tough decision?
86. Describe a time when your views were challenged. How did you navigate it?
87. What’s your definition of success? (question from Best Self)
88. What’s your North Star? (question from Best Self)
Long distance relationship conversation topics on marriage and planning a future
Credit: OlcayErtem
89. Where do you see yourself settling down?
90. How would you describe your home design aesthetic?
91. What’s one trait that makes you a good person to live with?
92. What’s one trait that makes you a bad person to live with?
93. How do you want our home to feel (literally and figuratively)?
94. How should we distribute chores and household responsibilities?
95. Would you consider moving to where I live?
96. How are we going to balance each other’s careers?
97. Do you want to have children? If so, how many?
98. How important is it for you to have children?
99. How would you support me if we have children and I want to return to work?
Long distance relationship conversation topics on finance and money habits
100. What did your parents teach you about money?
101. What money habits have you adopted from your upbringing?
102. How do you manage your finances?
103. Have you started investing and if so where are you investing your money?
104. What is your risk appetite?
105. Do you have any debts?
106. What is your credit score?
107. How do you envision us managing our finances together?
- How shall we delegate payment of rent, bills, and groceries?
- Who will build and monitor our budget?
- Should payment of taxes be a joint or personal endeavor?
108. How do you spend discretionary money?
109. What are your “essential” vs. “non-essential” purchases?
110. Do you want to make any big purchase items in the next three years?
111. How much can you afford to contribute annually to our retirement fund?
112. What are your retirement goals?
Long distance relationship conversation topics that are fun and interesting
Credit: OmarMedinaFilms
113. Where would you like to travel to?
114. What activities or experiences you’d like to participate in?
115. Would you rather be able to speak in every language or talk to animals?
116. You’re writing your autobiography. What’s the title of the chapter about your current phase of life? (question from Good Chat)
117. You’re offered your dream job, house, or vacation, but you can only pick one. What do you choose? (question from Good Chat)
118. If you could swap bodies with someone for a day, who would it be and why? (question from Good Chat)
119. If you could have dinner with anyone, living or dead, who would it be and why?
120. Would you rather have the ability to change the past or see into the future? (question from Good Chat)
121. Would you rather be the best player on a losing team or the worst player on a winning team? (question from Good Chat)
122. If you were representing your country in the Olympics, which sport would you like to participate in?
123. If you could only hold onto five physical items, what would it be and why? (question from Best Self)
124. When do you feel most alive (question from Best Self)
125. What controversial opinion do you enjoy sharing with others (question from Best Self)
126. Describe a memorable holiday
127. Is there a book you read that had an impact on you?
128. What song is currently on repeat on your Spotify/iTunes?
129. What would be your last meal?
130. Are there any restaurants you’ve been meaning to try?
How To Prepare For A Great Conversation
1. Set intentions
If this is the first time you’re introducing these long-distance relationship conversation topics, then it’s good to pre-empt your partner on the intention of this conversation.
Is the intention of this conversation to get to know them better? Or plan for your future together?
Either way, it’s good to inform them so that they’ll enter the conversation ready to emotionally connect with you.
2. Eliminate distraction
You and your partner must be fully present when having these intimate conversations.
If you’re not present or distracted, you might miss out on hearing important information and disrupt the flow of conversation so switch off your notifications and close your inbox.
3. Create a calm environment
Considering that these long-distance relationship conversation topics can lead to deep and personal insights, ensure that you’re doing it in a private space.
It’s also important to create an environment that’s calm so that you feel relaxed and so that you can hear your partner.
Examples of how to create a calm and quiet environment include decluttering your space, using noise-canceling earphones, and lighting up some candles.
4. Be curious
It’s important to cultivate curiosity when you’re listening to your partner.
Showing genuine interest in what they say shows that you care about them and want to learn more about who they are at this moment.
5. Respond accordingly
One way to develop curiosity is to ask them follow-up questions.
There might be occasions where you need clarification or might disagree with what they say, but by asking questions, you’re digging deeper into the root cause of their thinking and hopefully will gain a deeper understanding of their perspective.
Frequently Asked Questions
How to keep conversation interesting in a long-distance relationship?
Talk about your childhood, an important life phase, or a favorite memory. Describe an embarrassing moment. Sharing this can be a great way to bond and release any shame from this cringeworthy memory. Alternatively, you can ask them to describe your strangest dream.
Is sexting good for a long-distance relationship?
It’s popular for short-term affairs but experts claim those in long-term relationships benefit most from it. Whether it is sexually explicit messages, photos, or videos, this flirty form of communication is great for long-distance partners and live-in couples.
What is the bare minimum in a long-distance relationship?
Regular and open communication that is routine and being honest about your feelings is foundational for a healthy long-distance relationship. Building trust is also important and it’s built through consistent actions, understanding, and open conversations.
How do long distance couples be intimate?
Long-distance couples can fill their time with texts or verbal conversations when they communicate with each other. It’s important to talk about your everyday lives and learn about each other’s separate lives to grow emotional intimacy.
Conclusion
May these long distance relationship conversation topics help you uncover things about your partner you never knew (in the best way).
I know it can be difficult to be honest and vulnerable, especially around topics that are deemed sensitive or too personal.
But if we don’t initiate these conversations, we might miss out on emotionally connecting with our loved ones.
So I hope that these long distance relationship conversation topics will be a good place to start. All the best!